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Our first official family photos... I am holding Luke and Caleb is holding Max!

Luke and Max in their hats that their Grama Sophie knitted for them :)

We just got home and I am partaking in my new favorite past time... pumping! My goal for the day is to just RELAX! My house is a minor disaster but I know the time will come to clean more often than the time to lay in a lawn chair and relax.

Max all tuckered out and Luke stretching his little chicken legs! haha

Yesterday was a GREAT day! Caleb treated me like a birthday queen, my boys were doing well and I got to see them lots and I was able to spend some time with my parents and Caleb's parents! We got up, went out for breakfast, did some shopping, saw the boys, went out for lunch, saw the boys, went to Park Point, out for a fun dinner and then back to BOTH do kangaroo care together! It was perfect. (Made me really wish that we just lived in Duluth so we could see the boys all the time.)

We did get an update from the doctor yesterday on the boys. They are doing good, but suffering from some "normal" issues for their age. Both are having little apneic spells where they stop breathing. They are both breathing on their own and just have "in-room" air going through their cannulas, but because of this if they sleep real heavy they will forget to breath. Not fun for a mom to watch... when their lights ding and I watch their heart rates plummet! Then I just rub their little backs to get them to wake up. So... pray that they will get better with breathing. The other thing is they both have soft heart murmurs. Also normal for their gestational age. They have valves have have not had time to close yet. They might have to get some kind of medicine to treat it and if it doesn't work, be flown to Minneapolis for surgery (as I mentioned before.) Hopefully their valves will close on their own!

Luke's knees are getting a little softer looking...

Dad fell asleep holding Max :)

5/30/2010

I have a lot of great pictures to get up of Caleb holding Max last night but the internet connection in this wing of the hospital is terrible, so I will do that later. We got a boarding room last night which is right down the hall from the NICU... so nice to be right here. It is far from the Hilton, but it works. The weird thing is we have to walk down the hall to use the bathroom or shower. Feels a little weird!

The boys were doing really well last night when we checked on them. Luke was just chillin' in his isolette, on his back with his arms stretched over his head. So cute! He is still taking his feedings and pooping a little. His charts say he is just having "smears" in his diaper. Probably to be expected when you are only getting 1 ml of milk at a time! And... ready for this... after one week my little guy is back to his birth weight!!! 1 lb 9 oz. What a chunker :)

Max is doing better. Praise God! He started feedings again. Just about 0.5 ml every six hours so his body isn't overwhelmed. He also is doing good and was breathing a little by himself yesterday... without ANY aid. Not even C-PAP! Dad got to hold him last night and he did really well. What a natural. Max is almost to his birth weight. He has 3 oz. to go.

Today I am excited to spend some special "birthday" time with my hubby and some family. I miss being normal, but realize all of this is my new normal. I praise God daily for our blessings and can't wait for the future! Never, ever, ever dreamed I would hold these little peanuts on my birthday though! :)

I'm Free!

So in less than an hour I get to step outside of the hospital for the first time in 13 days! I really can't wait. I have felt a little like a prisoner :) All of the nurses here though made it feel more like home.

Went to see the boys this morning. They are doing good. Luke was out like a light and Max was getting his diaper changed. The nurse started laughing and said 'Get over here Mom!' I looked and he had a HUGE poop. (for his size) I was such a proud mama! No wonder he has been feeling so yucky... that is the first poop of his life! haha! Anyways, he still has to wait to see the doc before we can start feeding again.

I got to hold him then too. He was just a little fussy and the nurse said it was probably because he is hungry now that his tummy is empty and a little better. He gets IV nutrition and is fine that way, but doesn't get that good full feeling without the breast milk. So hopefully the little man can eat again soon!

Also, before I go, I have one little request. My poor Mom and probably some other family members have been swamped with phone calls after I post that the boys aren't doing well, etc. I just ask that you please continue to check here for updates. I will be good about posting when things happen. I just know it's overwhelming for my mom to be updating everyone when she doesn't have answers. Also, know that this process is full of up's and down's so things can change in the hour. And don't get me wrong, I SO appreciate the concern, but I will return the gesture by posting here ASAP. Thank you :)

PRAY

I just got back from checking on the boys (9:00 am) and they are not doing so great. So frustrating... this rollercoaster! I feel like I can do it some days and then others I just feel like what else! Anyways, they both are having problems with their tube feedings. Right now Luke is getting his central IV line changed from his belly button to his arm and they are holding his feedings off to see if the problems will subside. Max is having a harder time because they think he has an infection. He's had 3 x-rays in the last 12 hours and not sure what they have found yet. I think they are going to change his IV lines like Luke's and then start him on antibiotics no matter what. Bad part is if the antibiotics don't work he has to be transferred to Minneapolis to have surgery. I just pray that doesn't have to happen!!! Pray, pray, pray....

I get discharged tomorrow finally. Today I am going to just continue to lay low and probably just take some time to spend with the Lord... praying and reading my bible. I might even go up on the deck since it looks like a beautiful day.

Insomnia?

Pumping every 3 hours is starting to get a little annoying in the night. I pump at 4:00, 7:00, 10:00 and 1:00 then repeat so that I can be with the boys and work with their schedules. So... when I pump at 10:00 pm, I'm done by 10:20 pm and done cleaning and prepping the for the whole process to start again by 10:30 ish. If I'm not super tired by 10:30 pm I'll do a few things, watch a TV show then it's past 11:00 pm and I have to wake up at 1:00 am to start over. Okay, it's really not that bad at all, but I find myself not tired... all the time. I have a weird amount of energy through the day and night and here I can't do much with it. I have cleaned my room a little, but hey... it's a hospital room. What more can I do?!?

I just got up for my 1:00 am pumping and washed bottles, got my IV changed over, etc and it was like 2:30 am. Still not tired. So, I decided to take a little walk and visit my boys! I was so happy to see that they were both sleeping VERY sound. Just zonked out! I was so relieved that Luke was like that. I had some kangaroo time with him earlier tonight because I hadn't held him yet and after the nurse took and put him back in his incubator he cried for like 45 minutes! I was so upset after I tried changing his diaper, swaddling him, and talking to him. Finally I had to leave because I had to ... well you guess... yup, pump, AGAIN. I talked to his night nurse and she said when she came on shift he was fussy and the nurse she took over for said it was because he was mad he wasn't kangarooing with mom any more! Ah! I felt like I was walking on clouds when she said that! Not that Luke was fussy, but that he was fussing for mama! :)

Anyways, now I really am hoping I can sleep because it is almost 3:00 am and I have to wake up at 4:00 am to pump again! That would mean only 2.5 hours of sleep so far tonight. Don't tell Caleb! :) Oh- good news... no temp yet and it is almost to the 24 hour mark!!!!!! I might be able to be discharged Thursday and that means out of hospital by my birthday (Sunday)! Whooo hooo!

I know this is kind of gross, sharing my fever blisters with you all :)

Totally covered in prayer! We have received three prayer shawls! From Hayward Wesleyan, The River Church (Minong) and Grace Lutheran (Hayward). So awesome!

Daddy got Kangaroo Time!

Caleb and his mini me :)

Caleb was pretty excited to get some kangaroo time with Luke this morning before he headed for home. He is such a great dad. As he was holding Luke all of Luke's vital signs improved, just like they should during kangaroo care. It was almost as special as holding Max for me, watching my husband hold OUR baby. So amazing! Both of us were able to hold one of the boys first. I still need to hold Luke and hopefully will today.

I am still not in the clear. I need to go 24 hours without a fever. I am still getting them. It starts with uncontrollable shakes then on to unbearable feeling of hot. I am starting to get little fever blisters today all over my lips. Such a weird feeling! I haven't had a fever since 4 a.m. so hopefully it's a sign!!! Also, please be praying for Luke. He is having a little problems with his feedings today. They said it's normal for them to fluctuate with it. Hopefully he bounces back quick!

My new favorite picture!

Max sleeping while Dad holds Luke...

My time here has been long but so quick at the same time. I have made some truly lasting connections on this fifth floor with some of the nurses. They are amazing women. Peggy, on of my favorites, has been so great and offers to take me down to see the boys whenever I want! So sweet!

Time to go back in :(

Just Pics

Make sure to read the post below. (5/25/2010 Mommy AND Daddy Update) There is lots of information on there about how the boys are doing now! Thanks

Below is little Max tonight. He has to wear that little mask because of the blue light they put on him to prevent jaundice. It is best that they stay in a dark environment for their brain growth.

Below is Luke. He has his mask off and no blue light on now. He might again later. He also is starting to open his eyes in this picture!

FINALLY!!! Kangaroo care. I know... mom looks a little rough. I'm still trying to recover. Had another fever burst this afternoon :( But nothing could keep me from my boys. (it is safe for me to be with them because what I have is internal and nothing that effects them).

Max was so calm and sweet. I could feel his little chest lift up and down from mine.

He just rested there with his mouth wide open. Haha! Never have seen him do this or be so relaxed. I loved it!

Taking him off me... such a little peanut.

The pictures are a little blurry. So dark in there. Hopefully we will have some to add of Dad holding them next!

5/25/2010 Mommy AND Daddy Update

Just in a day... Below are pics of Max on Monday (top) and then today (bottom)!

Same with Luke. On the top is yesterday and on the bottom is today!

We feel like we have not been able to update you all on the good things that have been happening since so many things have been rough the past few days for me. I am still struggling with fevers (erratically) but they are getting better. Anything is better than the 103.8 F fever I had yesterday! They are still not sure what is wrong. They did find bacteria in my blood which indicates an infection but nothing has been determined for sure.

On to the good news!!!!! OUR BOYS! First of all Caleb and I want to say thank you from the bottom of our hearts for all the prayers and support. There is no doubt in my mind that God heard all the prayers for our little miracle babies. Yesterday we received a great report from the the NICU doctor saying the boys are doing better than average. He did day that things could turn for the worse quickly because of introducing so many new things at once; for example feedings of my milk by tube, taking off oxygen, etc. However, the report again today was amazing. The boys have responded extremely well to my milk and Luke has already had two poops, little ones of course.

They also are BOTH off of oxygen, breathing all by themselves and just have a "fresh air" tube in their nose. Luke is starting to open his eyes! So precious and exciting. We are starting to be able to do their"cares." This means every three hours they need to get their temps taken and diapers changed and we can now do that! So fun to be involved and not nearly as hard as I thought to change that little diaper. Tonight we also were able to have kangaroo care or skin to skin time with the boys. Unfortunately I was only able to get to Max. It was the most amazing thing in the world!!!!!! I feel so bad for Caleb because he can't hold them yet. Believe it or not the landscaper has poison ivy! Really bad time for that to happen. Hopefully tomorrow morning we can have him hold Luke though.

Overall, it is just amazing that they are doing so well. All of the NICU doctors and nurses, along with the nurses on the OB floor have been impressed by how well they are doing. One of my wonderful nurses, Wendy, came in today and said that she heard about how well the boys are doing and can only think that my due date must have been off. She said there is no way that they could have been THAT big at 25 weeks 5 days. Long story short, I explained to her that there was really no way that I got pregnant before December and that their 8 week ultrasound confirmed that my due date was supposed to be August 29th also. We all came to the conclusion that we have an awesome God! I told Wendy that from the time I heard how far I was progressed in Hayward, to the time I gave birth five days later I just kept repeating... All things are possible through Christ who strengthens me. Over, and over, and over and over. And so far that has held true! Praise GOD! I also told her that there are more people than we know praying for us and the boys.

Below I am just taking Max's temp under his0 armpit. He doesn't really like it!

Also, I want tell all the ladies who made it to the shower thank you so much for the prayers, for coming, and for all the amazing gifts! I have been getting a few gifts daily and then trying to open them, send thank yous and get them back home. It is amazing how busy and scheduled my days are up here! Between pumping every three ours, delivering my milk to the boys, doing their cares, then getting back to my room for IV's and other meds on certain hours has been a little more than I thought. Nothing hard, just very scheduled! I can't wait to get to all the gifts soon though!!!!!!!! And, I'm sure my schedule will be so much better once I get discharged and I can just pump and see the boys! Oh... and go outside for the first time in what seems like forever!

So please know that your prayers have been answered already in so many ways. THANK YOU and don't stop :)

5-24-2010 Daddy update

The boys are doing good and progress is still being made, however Mom is not so well. Doctors think she has an internal infection, and is in extreme pain. Blood tests and x-rays will come back tomorrow. So please keep praying for her and we ask that there will be no visitors for the next couple of days. She needs time for her body to recover. Thanks so much for your prayers and support. - Caleb

5/23/2010

Today was a busy, but great day. We were able to spend some time with family and are getting up to more time everyday with the boys. We can be in the NICU with them 24/7 but at this point I am taking little doses until I get stronger after recovery. I was feeling amazingly good today for only being my second day after surgery. I did have to have a c-section after laboring and dilating to the point of pushing because Max (baby on top) moved to a transverse (sideways) position right before pushing. They immediately, without question started to prep me for surgery. I was "out" for the entire thing because an epidural was out of the question at that point. I was having too hard and frequent of contractions for them to do it. Now on to the more fun stuff...

Luke - Born at 6:42, Friday, May 21st. 1 lb 8.5 oz 13" He is so little but mighty. He just amazes me everyday at how well he is doing. He did have to have a blood transfusion late last night because of losing some blood during the c-section. When they cut me open Luke's placenta was on top and was punctured also, causing him to lose some blood. He is doing great so far after the transfusion and even got his oxygen tube removed today so we can almost see his whole face! I could see his nose tonight and I think it looks like mine! :) He still has a little blindfold over his eyes since he is under strong light to prevent jaundice. So Luke is breathing totally on his own. He always looks so good when we see him, but just unbelievably tiny! Pray that his little lungs keep developing and he stays strong!

Max - Born at 6:44, Friday, May 21st. 1 lb 15 oz 14" He is our "chunker," at least compared to his older brother. Max is doing so well also considering the circumstances. He is also breathing on his own but is still being aided by a little oxygen over his nose. He definitely is working harder than Luke to breath. We are hoping soon that he will be off any type of breathing aid, but it almost looks more like he might have to be put back on the respirator for a while if he can't breath with less effort soon. He just breaks my heart when he breaths so hard; his little chest just sinks in so bad. They said that is normal, but it just looks like he hurts when he breaths.

We went down to see the boys around 8:30 and were hoping to have some "kangaroo care" (skin on skin contact) with Luke. We were told it is just a little too early and we could start to hold him most likely on Tuesday. I CANNOT WAIT!!! (At this point I can touch them in their incubators but we can't take them out yet.) The most bittersweet thing happened tonight when we were down there with Max too... he cried! You have to remember that I was completely under for my surgery and then the babies were obviously rushed to the NICU so I had never heard my babies cry yet. Max let out the sweetest little cry and I just GUSHED with tears. I just wanted him to stop immediately. It broke my heart to pieces and I just wanted to take him out of his incubator so badly. I did put my hand around his head and under his feet and he stopped crying, then I had to move because the nurse needed to fix something and he started crying again! It was too sweet. Needless to say it really helped my milk come in. So far pumping is going great and I can't wait until I can feed them myself.

Both Caleb and I just really want to thank everyone for all of the love and prayers and that have been washed over our new little family. I know people are praying me through because I am daily amazed by the grace and energy I have to deal with this whole situation. There are plenty of ups and downs daily, but just knowing that God has us in His hands and He is holding my little boys gives me the strength to meet each day. So THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! It means so much to us!

Our Miracles

Max and Luke are just little miracles, plan and simple. It is amazing that the Lord has brought them into the world already and that they look so perfect for how early they are. Twenty little fingers and twenty little toes, four elbows, four knees, eye brows for each, two perfect little tongues... it is absolutely amazing.
Please keep out little guys in your prayers. They are doing so well for the circumstances but their little lives are so fragile and can be in jeopardy in any moment.

Psalms 139: 13-16

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place. When I was woven together in the depths of the earth, your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.

The babies are out and Mom is doing good!

Luke Joas Yoder 1.8 lb. 13in.

Max David Yoder 1.15lb. 14in.

This information was brought to you by Daddy. Please check in for more info shortly. Thanks and please keep praying for my boys.

Update

Dr. Carr let me know yesterday that her goal is to get me to (and past) 28 weeks. So that means a total of 3 weeks here in the hospital. Just keep watching my pregnancy ticker!! I was moved last night to a long term room which has a TV and DVD player, microwave, and mini fridge. It is down the hall a ways too so it is quieter, which is nice.


My time here has actually been good and has gone by fast so far. It seems hard to believe that I've been here for 4 days already. Visitors have been nice to have and my mom has been super great. She has been here everyday and is a great nurse! :) We have taken out daily wheelchair rides up to the tenth floor to get some fresh air and so far I have not lost any appendages. We have been stuck a few times in some door ways, but it just makes it fun!

The hardest part so far is just being away from Caleb. I miss him so bad and just have a hard time not seeing him daily. There really isn't a busier time for him than spring/summer and we are thankful that the business is "booming." Part of me wants to pray for a rain day so I can see him more... but not sure if that would help! I'm looking forward to hopefully seeing him tonight.


Deb and Candy came yesterday. They brought a few more gifts and Candy brought me some peanut butter pie... a taste from home! Deb also brought some pictures of her twin pregnancy and she really encouraged me with her stories and memories.

The babies are being monitored in this picture.

More Pics

Up on the tenth floor roof top deck. So nice that they let me take a wheel chair ride up there. Made my day! I had to text Caleb a picture to let him know I was outside :)

I have been opening one to two gifts a day from my shower. As my mom or Candy or others come up they are bringing them with them! It makes it so fun for me and I have something to look forward to. Thanks everyone for all the beautiful gifts. I will get to them all soon! :)

My super lop-sided belly. They move so much that they will literally move my whole belly. Looks so weird!

Cute little bathrobes.